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Writer's pictureConnie Riet

Letting Go of Expectations and Finding Happiness ~ Mindful Living

Updated: Jun 14






By letting go of expectations I’m lighter and more carefree.

I think we all have expectations. Expecting things to happen a certain way, people to behave in a certain manner, and outcomes to be a certain result.

But what happens when these expectations are not met? Disappointment, stress, and frustration are just a few of the negative emotions that can arise.

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.” -Alexander Pope

When I expect certain outcomes to happen in the future, I create a gap between reality in the present moment and an imaginary ending.

This gap leads to unhappiness, frustration, and stress.

Because I can not control how future events will play out or how others will act, by setting an expectation, I am setting myself up for disappointment. Expecting myself to have reached certain achievements by my age, if I haven’t met these predetermined standards I feel inferior.

The very idea that everything in life events should pan out exactly how I expect is unrealistic and egotistical of me. The word “should” implies I view myself as a puppet master trying to control the world.

I’ve learned the hard way that putting my expectations on others only hurts my relationships. As a mother of three, I have had expectations of how my kids should behave and the path they should follow. Insisting they live by my expectations put a wedge between us.

No one should live a life for anyone else but themselves. Our relationships became stronger when I honored their choices and trusted they were carving the right path for themselves.



Letting go of my ego’s desire to be right softens my heart, allowing my relationships to be deeper and more authentic.

In the end, it’s more important to me to have peace, love, and harmony than it is to be right.

Letting go of expectations can be a liberating and empowering experience. It allows me to fully embrace the present moment and open myself up to new opportunities and experiences.

I may have assumed that a hike in the snow would be the same experience as usual. Which closes me off from all possibilities.

But, by being open to seeing the world through child-like eyes. While hiking during winter, I came across a magnificent cave.

I was in absolute awe of the contrast from the bright snowy mountains to the dark, damp cave complete with ice cycles, a pool of spring water, and a raccoon I disturbed from his sleep.

Holding onto expectations can be detrimental to my overall well-being and can prevent me from fully enjoying the present moment. But what if I were to let go of these expectations? What if I were to approach life with a more open and relaxed mindset like a child seeing the world for the first time? What adventures would I open myself up to?

When I release expectations of myself, others, and events I open myself up to new opportunities and experiences. I become more adaptable and flexible, which can lead to increased happiness and fulfillment. By removing the word “should” from my vocabulary, I release the chains of expectation and become free.

I’m free to be curious, playful, and adventurous. Living life boldly.

I can flow easily with the changing current of life. I don’t become upset, frustrated, or disappointed as often. I embrace the present moment more deeply because I’m not anticipating a preset outcome. I’m happy with my authentic self, loving who I am today. I enjoy cultivating healthy relationships because I invite others to be their authentic self too.

Letting go of expectations of myself, others and the world has brought me peace & happiness.

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